Hocus Pocus Mackus Frocus

Okay, so I am bored...I thought that since this is the case that I would just start typing on my blog and just share with you guys the things that are running through my mind as I sit in a very quiet office doing nothing. I am chatting my friend Brandon on Gmail and he is responding waaay too slowly...I almost want to just close out the page and feign technical difficulties the next time we chat, but that would be lying...so I will press on.


Some good news...my friend Shannon had her baby a couple of days ago. You remember her? (I blogged about her around Christmas and told about the difficulties they have had getting pregnant and how God just one day surprised them.) She is still in the hospital and I haven't seen her yet. I am really anxious to go see her but we have had some things to do everyday with no opportunity to get there. They waited until the birth to find out the sex. Convinced it was a boy she gave birth to a 9lb baby girl. Geez...I don't even want to think about anything weighing 9lbs being near my "area". I mean its a given that I really don't want a 9lb person using it as their exit strategy but actually, don't even set a dumbbell near it...Anything that's 9lb's please don't come near me. I would go off on a tangent about that right about now but a "Vagina Soapbox" would be an inappropriate topic for a public blog. (Come on people, don't be offended, we all know how baby's make their exits.) I digress.

She had to have a c-section and it was a long tough day, but in the end she gets to take a miniature person home...and well, isn't that the goal? Here they are:)




Shannon is super cute with a dimple and doesn't need makeup...she has short hair and though she struggled to give birth she looks pretty good. She didn't put on makeup before the cameras started flashing, she just went for it. That got me thinking about my upcoming delivery in November. I will be honest, you guys may not get to see the hospital pictures for I fear I will look a hot mess. If I make it through the delivery without drugs, which is the plan (though not a promise) I will cry...not little motherly weeping droplets, but big, fat, ugly cry faced, alligator tears. I will no doubt have what Adam calls my "Jesus hair" from rolling my head back and forth on the pillow yelling obscenities followed by apologies.

Jesus hair comes from a photo of me from the 4th grade that my unloyal mother loves to show people and once put on my birthday cake. I had just returned from a field trip and was so happy that I allowed someone to capture my carefree moments with a camera. I had sand and water on my face, (?) those teeth I mentioned a few blogs ago that faced each other and a shirt that was 3 sizes too big with the Coca Cola logo only instead of claiming Coca Cola as the real thing, it said "Jesus is the real thing." And my hair which was originally in a pony tail had a chunk of hair still remaining in that ponytail, but the rest (that is supposed to be slick and tight) fanned and stuck out around my face like the rays of the sun. (or porcupine) So mixing the two focal points of the photo, bad hair and Jesus, you get Jesus hair.

So, I doubt I will be prepared for a photo op, but Shannon looks good nonetheless.

I was supposed to be sharing my thoughts but now I realize that I need a snack...this is something that I realize about every 30 minutes. I really don't understand how something that isn't even a pound yet can make me feel so hungry so often. I honestly believe that she is in there jumping rope with the umbilical chord, smoking cigarettes and playing solitaire. They peacefully float around on the sonograms, but I am convinced other things are going on or else I couldn't possibly be so hungry. Last night I made Asian barbecue pork chops and succotash (mmmm...:) ) and I ate almost every bite, but afterwards I was talking to Adam and realized my stomach suddenly just felt empty...30 minutes hadn't even gone by!! So I had no choice, I had to put some chocolate chip cookies in the oven to go with 3 scoops of ice cream. I didn't WANT to do it, but I had no choice. It worked. Praying against gestational diabetes I fell soundly asleep without a single growl from my stomach.

Anyway, the point is I have to go. I need to find some food before this girl starts playing Dance, Dance Revolution on my placenta.

Til later,